Beyond Repair: A Conceptual Analysis on Reframing Aftercare as Relational Care in Consensual BDSM and Kink Relationships

Authors

  • Tanisha Ellis Tranquil Thoughts TX PLLC , Our Lady of the Lake University image/svg+xml Author
  • Monique Aviles Our Lady of the Lake University image/svg+xml Author

Keywords:

BDSM, Aftercare, kink, Care, Consent, Boundaries

Abstract

Within the Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, and Sadism and Masochism (BDSM) and kink literature, aftercare has been historically conceptualized as a restorative process that promotes emotional, psychological, and physiological recovery post consensual scenes. The historical conceptualization highlights the importance of post-scene support; however, it positions aftercare as a response to dysregulation. This conceptual manuscript aims to critically examine the existing literature on aftercare and proposes an expanded framework to distinguish between aftercare as repair and aftercare as care. This manuscript utilizes the existing scholarship related to BDSM, kink, attachment, intimacy, trauma, and relational maintenance to argue that aftercare can extend beyond recovery as the sole purpose and has the ability to function as an intentional expression of emotional connection, relational security, and ongoing caregiving within consensual dynamics. Reframing aftercare as a reparative and relational practice aids in considering a deeper theoretical understanding of post-scene care, identifying opportunities for future empirical research, and expanding culturally responsive clinical practice within the BDSM and kink communities.

 

Author Biographies

  • Tanisha Ellis, Tranquil Thoughts TX PLLC, Our Lady of the Lake University

    Tanisha Ellis, LCSW (she/her), is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker based in Texas and the founder of Tranquil Thoughts TX, a private practice serving San Antonio and surrounding communities. Her clinical work is grounded in affirming, client-centered care, with a focus on supporting historically marginalized populations through culturally responsive, trauma-informed practice. She is passionate about increasing access to mental health services while fostering resilience, self-compassion, and holistic well-being across the lifespan.

    Mrs. Ellis is currently pursuing a PhD in Social Work at Our Lady of the Lake University, where her scholarship examines the intersection of consent, trauma, and mental health. Her research challenges traditional pathological understandings of consensual BDSM by exploring how consent can fundamentally shape the meaning of experiences often misunderstood within clinical settings. More broadly, her work reflects a commitment to expanding culturally competent and sex-positive mental health practice through research, education, and advocacy.

    Outside of her professional roles, Mrs. Ellis enjoys spending time with her wife and daughter, exploring bookstores and book festivals, watching movies, and tackling creative projects that allow her to unwind and reconnect with the people she loves.

     

  • Monique Aviles, Our Lady of the Lake University

    Monique Aviles (she/her/hers) is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and founder of Bloom Haus Wellness, PLLC, a private practice based out of Texas. She holds a Bachelor of Science in Accounting from Alcorn State University, a Master of Social Work from Pennsylvania Western University–Edinboro, and certificates in Sexuality Education and Sex Therapy from the University of Michigan. Monique is deeply committed to creating affirming, culturally grounded spaces for the BIPOC and LGBTQ+ communities to heal and grow. 

    Monique is currently pursuing her PhD in Social Work at Our Lady of the Lake University in San Antonio, Texas. Her research explores how sexual minority women, to include individuals who were assigned female at birth, create, navigate, and maintain intimacy during menopause whilst living within a cisheteronormative societal system. In a wider sense, she aims to focus on the intersection of sexual health, sexual exploration, and mental health within Black American communities through examining how cultural, social, and systemic factors shape psychological well-being and access to care.

    During her free time, Monique enjoys reading urban scientific-fiction literature, spending time with her children, attending concerts, and travelling to various beaches around the world. 

     

Downloads

Published

25-09-2026

Issue

Vol. 2 No. 2 (2026): Beyond the Assumptions: Kink, Care, Power, and Practice

Section

Research, Theory, & Resources

How to Cite

Beyond Repair: A Conceptual Analysis on Reframing Aftercare as Relational Care in Consensual BDSM and Kink Relationships. (2026). The Journal of Kink & Community, 2(2), 2-21. https://journalofkink.community/index.php/access/article/view/14

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